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Lo! The Moon Landing!

  • thebinge8
  • Aug 27, 2024
  • 4 min read
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O Frabjous Day! Calloo Callay! She chortled in her joy! So began the 20th day of the 7th month in the year 1969 A.D., a date whose import and singularity would be seared forever into the cerebellums of every sentient human frail-bodied and air-sucking on Earth's tattered teat, all 3,617,806,500 of them, from the Parshwa-nath-tressed Jain to the Balinese gamelan-clanging Aga and the Alka-Seltzer-gargling Iowan mallrat, each of their individual-yet-corporately-conjoined eyeballs trained like umpteen trillion rays from the Cyclops's unblinking gaze on the same unbelievable panorama of Mankind's bravest venturing forth to extend its sweaty palm and cosmic high-five to the sterile virginity of the pockmarked Moon-Bitch, that pale mistress whose every crater's curve and terminator's promise had for ages left us dribbling in our Fortran-punched pantaloons.

And what an Odyssey it was, spanning the very vasties of interplanetary space, with all its Stygian gulfs and cosmic ocean's flat unplumbednesses, a voyage whose sheer scale and protraction and existential derring-do would have made even the most phlegmatic of Scandinavian Über-Mensch's palms sweat and their Vikingr-brains grow dizzy with vertigo. For four lorn solar revolutions did the three heroes - Armstrong, Aldrin, and Collins (surnames that, when examined for their symbolic portents, seem almost too cosmically on-the-nose to be fortuitous) - hurtle through the lidless void, imprisoned in their tiny sky-chariot, with naught but their own mortal wits and the guidance of some furiously scribbling mathematicians to steer their trajectory.

And when finally the Eagle's talons did grasp the Moon's dusty mantle, its landing was far from the serene and stately progress one might have envisioned. No, the poor vessel was practically in convulsions, her computations gone haywire, her fuel nearly tapped, her pilots' nerves as taut as an Appalachian granny's clothesline. It was all Armstrong could do to manually wrest her onto the surface while Aldrin no doubt gripped his seat, reciting the Lord's Prayer and promising his first-born to the Void if only they didn't become the first space-age pancakes.

But land they finally did, and in that moment the whole of humanity - from the Ubangi tribesmen to the Saskatoon zookeepers - achieved an apogee of cosmic transcendence and karmic oneness, their souls all briefly unclenched and united in a collective Bactrian-camel-through-the-needle-eye epiphany of wonderstruck awe. For one infinite nanosecond, all the rancid feuds and culture clashes paused, all the Gordian knots of pride and fear and hatred were united in a single wordless chorale of celebration at what our insignificant species could achieve when it truly put its frail pink minds to it.

So let those who wax cynical about the modern human condition take heed - for on one lonesome day, we were all brothers and sisters gaping together through the luminous windows of existence, our jaws agape in a spirit of shared transcendence that yet beckons to us across the abyss of years, a reminder of the boundless and bonkers possibilities our upright ape spirits yet may achieve, if we could but keep the audacity of our hopes aloft like a Ganswindt balloon, ever outward wafting towards new lunations.


Let's talk about the moon landing, folks.


When Neil Armstrong took his first steps on the Moon, he famously said, "That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind." Little did he know that his words would be misheard by millions as "one small step for man, one giant leap for a man-kind." It's a good thing he wasn't referring to a specific type of man!

To be a space-faring civilization means that a society has developed the technological capabilities to explore and travel beyond its home planet. It's a significant milestone in the evolution of a species, marking its transition from being confined to a single world to becoming a multi-planetary species.

One of the key aspects of being a space-faring civilization is the ability to launch spacecraft and other vehicles into space. This requires advanced rocket propulsion systems, navigation technologies, and the ability to manufacture and assemble complex machinery. It's a testament to human ingenuity and our relentless pursuit of knowledge and exploration.

During the early days of the space race, a Soviet cosmonaut was asked how he felt about being the first human to go into space. He replied, "I'm not worried about being the first man in space; I'm more concerned about being the last one to come back!"

Another crucial aspect of being a space-faring civilization is the ability to sustain human life in the harsh and unforgiving environment of space. This requires advanced life support systems, radiation shielding, and the ability to produce and recycle resources like water, food, and oxygen. It's a remarkable feat of engineering and a testament to our ability to adapt and thrive in environments that were once thought to be inhospitable.

A NASA engineer was once asked why they spent so much money on space exploration when there were so many problems on Earth that needed to be solved. The engineer replied, "Because the problems on Earth will be a lot easier to solve once we've figured out how to live on other planets."

Ultimately, being a space-faring civilization is about more than just technological achievements. It's about pushing the boundaries of human knowledge and exploration, expanding our horizons, and ensuring the long-term survival and prosperity of our species. It's a journey that has captured the imagination of generations and will continue to inspire us for generations to come.



 
 
 

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